I want your sweat

A runner of 15+ years, I feel like I’ve seen it all.  However, despite the insanely hot temperatures and painstakingly atrocious humidity, today my I saw runners through a different lens.  Let’s call it, “He’s a hot mess.”

As a weaved in and out of the crowds at the nation’s largest ten-miler this morning, instead of being annoyed at all of the people who obviously lied about their finish time so they could be in a faster starting corral, I squinted through my sweaty eyes and saw a plethora of sexy, sweaty men.  Jackpot!

Striking up a conversation with one of these glistening hotties was going to be easy.  I could “accidentally” spill water on his arm at the water stop – he’d think my meak “Sorry” apology was cute and then we’d run the rest of the race together.  Maybe he’d even grab my hand as we crossed the finish line. 

No.  That’s too dramatic.  Plus, water/sweat/spit was flying everywhere.  I doubt any delish dude would notice.

I could start the convo with a funny anecdote about how I almost passed out in the port-o-potty at mile five, at which I’m not sure if that’s pee or sweat on my leg, but does it really matter with all this heat? 

Hmm…that might be a bit intimidating first impression.

As I finished the race, I began to feel hungry and instead of men, I thought of cheese steaks and beer.  But perhaps I’ll have to sign up for races more frequently and put my pick up lines to work.  Who knows?  It could turn out to be the match.com for runners.  Plus, all the men would be in shape.  No 3-day trial necessary; just as few as three miles.  What a bargain!

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~ by citygal on May 2, 2010.

5 Responses to “I want your sweat”

  1. WE ARE MEN!!! WE ARE HORNY!!! WHAT DON’T YOU STILL GET? HOW ARE YOU MAKING THIS HARDER THAN IT HAS TO BE!!!
    Maaaaybe if you were an ugly girl i could see you having a problem but really? Are you just writing this lame no self-confidence bit just to get reader sympathy?
    Step 1)Make eye-contact and smile sexually
    Step 2)IF he doesn’t approach and is far smile again
    Step 3)IF he STILL doesn’t approach and is NEAR, say hello
    Step 4)Don’t give mixed signals with group dates, make sure you accidentally touch him
    Step 5)Have sex with him to show him you like him.

    See! EASY as the pie he’ll be gettin’. OH! snap

  2. hahahah! right. because women don’t have the 3rd date rule.
    and i thought citygal’s last man and her might have been making more than kissy fireworks before then.

    You women want it just as bad as us; quit letting cultural relativism rule your lives.

    And yes, men do get uninterested very very quickly. If we do not get regular, visually stimulating sex, then we will move on. Someone had to say it.

    • Not all men are like that though, and the course a relationship takes depends on the chemistry and what both people want. And it’s not all about sex; those men who think that are not the kind of men I’m looking for.

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