It’s one thing to be physically drained – as a distance runner I can appreciate the feeling of lactic acid cramping up my legs, forcing me to walk down flights of stairs sideways.  What I’m not a fan of is emotional drainage, especially the kind that makes not only your brain hurt, but your heart ache. 

In my mind, there is a reason and an answer for everything.  But in life, this isn’t always the case.  When life, or relationships in this instance, fail to make sense, I try my darndest to figure them out.  This becomes exhausting and usually, my findings leave me feeling unclear and I continue to grapple with numerous “What if’s?” and “Why’s?”

Although I know I should forego trying to make sense of things that are unclear and out of my control, I push it to the back of my mind.  I try to forget.  But it mystefies me.  It haunts my soul. 

And so I crash.  Emotionally drained.  And I wonder – is that old cliché true?  Does everything happen for a reason?


~ by citygal on February 17, 2010.

3 Responses to “Drained”

  1. What months of therapy have taught me is to let go. You should get “The Language of Letting Go” by Melody Beattie. There is a book, but what I really love are the boxed set of cards. You can get them on Amazon. Each day I read two or three cards and they remind me of what is important and to let go of what I can’t control. I agree, life doesn’t make sense and a lot of the time it just sucks, but we have to focus on what we can control. And eat a lot of ice cream!
    *Hugs* Feel better!

  2. I’m definitely an everything-happens-for-a-reason girl!! I’ve found that if you can really understand and believe that, then coping with some things in life becomes a lot easier. Emotional exhaustion is the worst!!! Hope you feel better soon. X

  3. I do the same…whenever things get tough,i look to sleep to help me bear it!

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